Team Shirley

Clare and I out and proud striding in our t.shirts x

Team Shirley - raising funds for the Stroke Foundation

This September, we're taking part in Stride for Stroke in memory of our beautiful Mum, Mother-in-Law, Grandma, friend, and everything else she was to the many people who were lucky enough to know and love her. 

September is hard. So, so hard. It's Mum's birthday month, and it's also the month she died, on 17 September 2025. We want to honour her memory by taking part in Stride for Stroke and raising awareness of a condition that changed her life, and ours, forever. 

For months before her first stroke, Mum kept saying that she didn't feel right. She described it as "brain fog" and knew that something wasn't quite right. After several doctor appointments and tests, she was diagnosed with COPD. Mum being Mum, she was determined to do everything she could to live with COPD and start rehabilitation as soon as possible. But even after the diagnosis, she still wasn't well. She thought she had caught the flu and would constantly say, "I'm going to beat this." 

At the end of July, while having lunch with friends, one of them noticed Mum was leaning to one side and didn't look herself. An ambulance was called and Mum was admitted to hospital. Following a CT scan, she was rushed to another hospital for emergency brain surgery. The doctors were able to remove the clot and what happened next felt nothing short of miraculous. Mum showed signs of recovery and was accepted into a stroke rehabilitation program. She was so excited to get started, looking forward to wearing her matching tracksuits and meeting new people. 

After just one day of rehabilitation, everything changed. 

Over the weekend, during her first stay in the rehab unit, Mum suffered multiple strokes affecting both sides of her brain. This was very perplexing to the doctors, as Mum was already on blood thinners. From that point, Mum lost the use of her legs, had very limited movement in her arms, struggled to speak, struggled to swallow, and became bed-bound. 

To go to the bathroom, it took two nurses and a hoist to transfer Mum from her bed to a chair. All dignity and independence seemed to disappear overnight. Mum later said she just wanted to go to the toilet by herself and not feel rushed. Everything about this time was heartbreaking and traumatic. The strokes took away so much, not only from Mum, but from everyone who loved her. 

One of the hardest things is knowing that if the strokes had not left her so physically disabled, her final days may have looked very different. She may have been able to spend them at home, surrounded by the comfort of family and friends. 

We later learned that a CT scan approximately two weeks before her first major stroke had shown evidence of a chronic stroke that Mum never knew she had suffered. She was never called in for a follow-up appointment and was never informed of the result. Shortly afterwards, the devastating chain of events that changed all of our lives began. 

After the multiple bilateral strokes, Mum could no longer swallow and received nutrition through a feeding tube. She hated it. It was painful, uncomfortable, and often made her sick when the feed flowed too quickly. Mum underwent many tests to find out why she continued to have strokes despite being on blood thinners. The answer was devastating. She was diagnosed with advanced lung cancer and told she had only weeks to months to live. 

Knowing this, Mum made the incredibly brave decision to have the feeding tube removed and let nature take its course. 

We will never know whether earlier recognition of the warning signs could have changed what happened to Mum. What we do know is that stroke awareness matters. Mum knew something wasn't right long before her first stroke. By sharing her story, we hope to encourage greater awareness, earlier investigation, and ultimately better outcomes for others. 

The last 12 months have been the hardest of our lives. We miss Mum every single day. 

We're walking to honour Mum's strength, courage, and determination. We're walking so that more people understand the signs of stroke and so that fewer families have to experience the heartbreak that ours has endured. 

If you would like to support us, please consider making a donation or joining Team Shirley and striding alongside us this September. There is absolutely no pressure to donate, but we do ask that you take a moment to read Mum's story and share what you've learned with those around you. Increased awareness could help someone recognise the signs of stroke sooner and potentially change a life. 

Together, let's help make a difference for families affected by stroke and support efforts to prevent others from experiencing the devastating impact that stroke can have. 

A life well lived. Forever loved, forever missed, and forever in our hearts. ❤️ 

For Shirley.